Copy Cat

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 My whole life I always hated it  when people copied me. Those who love me know it well and hopefully don’t love me less because of it. But I always deemed it as a form of identity theft. I know some will say imitation is the highest form of praise. But for me, imitation is the highest form of irritation.  And I’ve often racked my brain as to why it bothers me so much. Was I afraid that if you wore the same hat and ring that I would mistake you for me? At what point do I risk losing my unique identity altogether? And then I think about it another way and question whether those things which are copyable are really me at all. Some advise and say if you’re being copied then you must be doing something right. But I’ve concluded that if I am copyable then I’m doing something very wrong. For each one of us is a unique soul and if I’d be truly pressing my soul to extricate what is uniquely me it would be as inimitable as a thumb print.  Not for the first time my grievance would become my teacher. 

One day as I was out and about doing errands, a cashier complimented me on my shoes. The vanity in me was of course happy to hear it. After all, they are my favorite shoes. But were they Aliza?  What do they really have to do with me? The day I throw them away will there be less of me in the world? Of course such a compliment is nothing to write about. But I am because what came just before stood in beautiful contrast. 

As I had pulled into the parking lot, a woman just getting back into her car was looking suspiciously at something. The terror in me quickly rose. Oh no, what's behind me? A gunman? A cop? A mugger? I asked her what she was looking at and she pointed out that a blind man seemed to have lost his way.  I turned and saw he was headed right into a somewhat busy street. In my way-too-high shoes, I dashed over to him and asked him if he needed help. I thought I'd just be crossing the street and then I’d go back to shopping. No, he needed help getting to Citibank. For many weeks I'd been avoiding the Florida sunshine and the hateful freckles it leaves me as souvenirs. But here, mid-day, with the merciless sun beating on my head, I found myself walking half a mile; the blonde was leading the blind with me asking him for landmarks to know whether we were going in the right direction. It turned out he was Jewish and had been blind from birth. I just wish I would trust in G-d even more to lead me to the right place as the blind man trusted me. I can't help but think he was there to show stumbling, bumbling me the way to faith. Upon replay, I thank him now for two things. One, he gave me the chance to do a mitzvah and second, his blindness made me see clearly that the Aliza that is copyable is not Aliza at all. He couldn't see anything about me except who I really was. The hour I spent in front of the mirror getting ready was meaningless to him. I concluded that that day my shoes really earned any compliment they ever got because they worked in the service of G-d and doing a mitzvah. And that's life. It's all about who wears the shoes and how you walk in them. 

In this week’s parasha, "Vayechi," the last in the book of Genesis, we read about the imminent death of Jacob who with foresight at the impending moment blessed his sons, the future tribes of Israel. His parting words were by no means a blanket blessing to wish his sons a one-size-fits-all good luck and farewell. Each son received a unique blessing which was intrinsic to his soul and his idiosyncratic and divine destiny. Each tribe would ultimately be represented by a precious stone embedded in the breastplate of the high priest when serving in the Holy Temple. Could the sapphire representing Issachar imitate the pearl which represented Zebulun? Could the emerald representing Judah imitate the turquoise representing Naphtali? Each gem has its own beauty and brilliance to reflect in the world.  Ultimately, scholars descended from Issachar, seafarers from Zebulun, leaders from Judah, judges from Dan, priests from Levi, etc.  Why even bother having 12 tribes if each was destined to be like the other.  Obviously, they were not. “All these are the twelve tribes of Israel...each man, according to his blessing, he blessed them.” (Genesis 49:28)

When we become the best and highest version of ourselves, no one can steal our thunder because we own the sky.  Don’t tell Cecil B DeMille, but the Sages teach that when the Jews left Egypt the Red Sea didn’t split into two, it actually split into twelve paths, providing a distinct path for each of the twelve tribes. Each one of us should to take an honest, deep look at ourselves and find the gem within that is distinctly us--and polish it. Life is not only about living a purpose-driven life; it is about living, in heightened form, our own unique purpose. I walked away from the mirror and what I thought was me was no longer reflected. Here I am now at my laptop, writing only what I can write. It is my purpose, it is my soul, it is my thumbprint, it is Aliza. Who are you?

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Breathtaking Times

 

As an emphatic way to describe an experience, people will say, “It took my breath away.” I too, like everyone else, am moved by things and happenings. But, in honesty, I seem to be wired for bad news, and I can’t say that anything ever took my breath away other than a cardio workout.

But then, two things, unfortunately, did. My father's death and October 7th, 2023, the day Satan's executioners, Hamas, a terrorist organization slaughtered over 1200 Israelis including mothers, children, and just everyone, without discrimination. The only discriminating factor is that they were aiming for Jews. These killers were equal opportunity destroyers. They killed youngsters at parties, raped them, dismembered people, cut off baby's heads burned people alive, and forced families to watch as they perpetrated sadistic crimes on other members of the family. They took hostages of every age. We've heard and documented so many accounts of their subhuman atrocities that

it's so darn difficult to catch one's breath. Then the streets of the world fill not with expressions of solidarity and mourning with and for the Jewish people, but rather with calls to victimize them further. People call for a ceasefire while simultaneously calling to fire up the gas chambers once again, to kill Jews. 

So many of us are no left breathless.

 I can't recall which rabbi said the following, but his words became my new oxygen: “If one cannot catch one’s breath, how can one claim to be connected to Hashem and to be living in faith? We overload our system with fear instead of faith. Worrying about tomorrow, we strive to seize breaths not yet allotted to us, attempting to fit a year's worth of breaths into a single day. 

We read in the Book of Genesis how G‑d breathed the breath of life into Adam. G-d’s breath is our animating force. Yet, often we forget this and become burdened by grief, fear, and disappointment, disconnecting from G-d and going breathlessly through the motions of life as the world unravels around us. 

We can learn an empowering life lesson from our forefather Jacob in this week’s Torah portion of Vayishlach. Jacob’s life story is marked by heartache and challenges. His life could be turned into a Netflix drama with at least seven seasons. Yet, true to his name, Jacob, meaning the heel of a foot, he propelled himself forward in life. His heartaches did not become his Achilles heel, nor did he use them as excuses to spurn G-d. 

Jacob breathed because he believed. 

As Martin Luther King Jr. once said, “Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.” But if you want to climb it, you have to breathe, let go, and let G-d. 

It's written in our Tanach that in the messianic times, all the Jews will gather from the four corners of the world and return to the Promised Land. Have we ever in our lifetimes seen such a driving force? With that thought, I catch my breath. It's written in messianic times that the whole world will turn against the Jews, and we will have only God. Have we ever been so close to that in our lifetimes? With that, I catch my breath. It's written that truth will be abandoned; have we ever seen that more than now? With that, I catch my breath. It's written that there will be unbridled irresponsibility on the part of authorities and impudent leadership. Have we ever seen such incompetence and a conscious dereliction of duty as we do now? With that, I catch my breath. Live in faith, keep close to God by doing mitzvot. Now is not the time to sin while our trial is playing out. 

I'll end with lyrics from a song written by an English rock band called The Police. Just pretend it’s G-d singing them to you: 

Every BREATH you take

And every move you make

Every bond you break

Every step you take

I'll be watching you.

From where will my help come?

What does G-d want from us?" "What do our haters want from us?" These questions have become ever more popular since the war in Israel. But they've been around for thousands of years.

These are spiritually-driven questions, yet we, the askers never seem satisfied with spiritual answers. Tell people it's all about stopping their sins and elevating the world through Torah, tell them it’s about loving your brother Jew, and they will roll their eyes, shut you up. Torah? Nah! There has to be another way," is a reply I've often heard from those trying to avoid any religious duty that might interrupt their daily routines. We opt for alternative means to fill the void, pursuing materialistic ornaments, promiscuity, Botox, yoga, body sculpting, travel, shopping, decorating, golfing, and various distractions, and another day passes without the creation of light. And if you think when this war is over, if it ever is, that we can revert to our old misbehaviors think again.

The question, "What does G-d want from us?" remains puzzling to me. When we read articles about diets, we comprehend what dietary changes we should make. When we read self-help books, we understand the recommendations for a better life. So, why is it that when we read G-d's book, we suddenly become illiterate and struggle to understand our native tongue? We have had the Torah for over 3,334 years--and yet we fail to grasp what G-d wants from us?

When it comes to the truth, we cannot go shopping for the answers we prefer, as if they were items on eBay. The Torah is the only truth, the blueprint for all creation, G-d's architectural plan for the world. To understand the world and our place in it, we must refer back to the original "user's manual." Failing to do so renders us not "truth seekers" but voluntary obfuscators, guilty of manufacturing our own darkness.

So, how can we extricate ourselves from the ever-deepening black hole? One way it through prayer! It is a powerful tool, like a sharp-pointed arrow that can pierce the heavens and save us. Just as pulling a bowstring closer to your heart propels the arrow farther, heartfelt and truthful prayers reach greater heights. When we pray to G-d with all our hearts, souls, and might, we can draw closer to our Maker and even alter the course of nature. Praying and reconnecting with G-d is the ark of our survival. Interestingly, the Hebrew word for "ark," as in Noah's ark, also means "word," alluding to prayer. Prayer is what kept the ark sailing and impermeable.

If our voices can activate Alexa, why would we doubt their impact on the heavens? G-d, like a parent, eagerly awaits to hear from us. Prayer teaches us to be deliberate and articulate in our requests, just as we resent communicating with people who are preoccupied with their phones. G-d, too, wants our undivided attention. Pray as if you care about your relationship with the Divine, not impatiently to get it over with. As Rabbi Doniel Katz pointed out, "How you pray is how you live your life."

As we suffer now through this dark time of war, we can still find and create the light. If we want to fix the world, then we have to return to the user's manual written by God. If you wanted to fix your oven, you wouldn’t read the manual for your washing machine, so why continue seeking for remedies and solutions and answers in all the wrong places. 

Don't think, 'What can I do? I'm only one person.' Remember, Noah was just one person too, and if he would have chosen not to be part of the solution, there really would be nothing to talk about. Mankind would  be extinct and there'd be no one to read this article -- or to write it.

“Hear, O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is one.”

Where is the Light?

 

In a world marked by division and conflict, the wisdom of the Torah has the power to serve as a guiding light in this dark hour. The devastating and homicidal terror attacks in Israel have shaken the very foundations of the Jewish community. The refrain of “Never Again” has been fatally edited. The word “never” has been deleted, and now the Jews pay by the word — with their blood. We look into each other’s faces for answers and comfort only to find reflections of our own anguish, grief, and fear. But now, however regretful of the reason, we are looking at each other as family, as fellow Jews, and not turning a cold shoulder, not demonizing the other. A nation that was becoming ever divided has united again in common purpose. And in that unity, we are already beginning to see the light. Israel, the Jewish people, and the Torah are one. Disqualify any pieces, and the entirety is fractured and vulnerable.

The opening chapter of Genesis recounts the creation of our world in six days which evolved from disorder to order, from darkness to light. “And G-d saw the light, that it was good; and G-d divided between the light and between the darkness.” It reminds us that, even in pitch blackness when chaos seems to prevail, there is a Divine plan at work that is aiming for the light, wanting the light, preserving the light. But the work is left no longer for God alone to do. We must play our parts too. In a fractured, evil world, our primary mission is to fill it with light. That light is found in the Torah.

Jews are destined to be a light among the nations. Well, what exactly do we have that can light the way? Is our DNA fluorescent? What we have is the holy Torah that is the torch for humanity. But too many of us have shoved the Book on the shelf. We are too cool and too modern for God. Too busy, too ambitious, too practical, too important, too rich, too gorgeous. But every time we forget we are Jews, while mistaking ourselves for whatever else, our enemies successfully remind us.

In this week’s Torah reading, God says, "Let us make man." Who is the "us"? We are the "us"; we are the partners in creating ourselves. This week the world has changed forever. The future of humanity is being reset; now, what will we emerge as out of this chaos? What will we make of man. The world is now in a war between good and evil; compassion and hatred; light and darkness. We have perhaps our last chance to get it right now.

The truth is we are a people who glow in the dark. When Moses came down from Mount Sinai after receiving God’s word, his face was illuminated with Divine light. The Torah can change our DNA --Epigenetics has revealed that DNA is not static but can undergo modifications and changes -- and all of us can glow by keeping the mitzvot in the Torah. But if we ignore our duty as Jews now, we will surely be submerged in spiritual darkness in tunnels of darkness. We are being dragged underground, but that is not where the light is.

All religions believe that we are reaching or living through messianic times. Now is the time to get it right. Life will never go back to what it was; a new age is upon us. We can’t hide in Netflix or Prime Video anymore. Because the darkness is coming for us all, and it’s imperative to choose which army you are fighting for. Iron domes, missiles, tanks; wonderful to have, but they will not save us. "The Lord is a master of war; the Lord is His Name." And He is the General we must count on. We have to attach ourselves to His light, the only light. Like Victor Hugo once wrote, "They confound the brilliance of the firmament with the star-shaped footprint of a duck in the mud."

Take upon yourselves to do a mitzvah, the real brilliance, not the mud. Be proud to be a Jew. We've tried it our own stubborn way over and over again, and the result is the same every time. An enemy emerges, and we say: “Here we go again.” Well, Einstein said that repeating the same thing and expecting a different result is insanity. It's time to see the light, be the light, and share the light. Or, we will find ourselves in a never-ending night. If we don’t live by the word, we will die by the sword.

Where's Your Fruit

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There is a story about a man who lived in a small village and who had a great appreciation for trees. He loved their majesty, the shade they sometimes offered, and the sweet fruits they bore.

One summer day, the man, who was no longer very young, planted a carob tree near a clear stream and cared for it diligently. As the years passed, he continued to nurture it, even though he knew he might not live long enough to taste its fruits or enjoy its shade. When asked why he devoted so much time to a tree he would never benefit from, he replied, 'I plant this tree not for myself but for the generations that will follow. Just as those who came before me planted trees for my benefit, so too must I plant for those who will come after me.'

Now, let's think about a lesson from the Torah, where we learn about Moses and his ascent up Mount Nebo. Moses, despite all his sacrifices and dedication, was not allowed to enter the Promised Land. Instead, he went up Mount Nebo, where he could only gaze upon it from afar. You might wonder, 'Is that fair?'

In this generation, the answer will be a definite no because we often think that life is all about us, consumed by self-centeredness and arrogance, leaving no room for others or for God. We don't realize that we play a part; we are not the entire part. But it seems that everything we do and everyone we speak to often has an agenda attached to it. We use everything we have to serve ourselves alone, believing the world revolves around us. And indeed, the world does revolve around us to save it for everyone else, to elevate it for everyone else. The Talmud teaches if you save a single life, it's as if you saved an entire world. The whole world depends on us, each and every one of us. We all want to be important, so there you go, we're important.

Yes, Moses was the greatest prophet who ever lived because it wasn't all about him. In fact, he was ready to have his name written out of the Torah.

I find nothing more troubling than this selfie generation, capturing moment after moment of the self in every type of situation. But my question is, what are we doing in between those pictures? What are we as human beings when we are not collecting phony likes for photoshopped pictures? Who among us is planting trees to ensure that the world we leave behind is better than the one we found?

With greed, hate, and moral compromises, we are destroying this world. The big legacy we care to leave our kids is money. That's very nice, but once it's spent, what's left of you? What's left of your kids? What's left of this ever-imploding world?

Selfishness is an antithesis to the five senses with which God created and blessed man, for it has no eyes for the suffering of its sister, has no ears for the cries of its brother, it smells not its own stench, it has no parched tongue to know another’s thirst, and it has no heart to feel or hand to touch another in comfort.

In the Torah, it's written that 'Man is Like the Tree of the Field.' Just as a tree sustains and provides for others, humans are responsible for nurturing and caring for their environment, community, and future generations. We can't poison the habitat and expect that any of us can thrive." Shabbat Shalom

Where is Your Head?

 Often when parents send their children off into the fracas of life, they dispatch them with the warning: “Be careful and use your head.” But isn’t that advice all rhetoric and trite? What else would we use to engage life? Our toes? Our elbows? It is only as we grow older that we realize what we once deemed as a parental platitude is wisdom that no sophist can equal. For even though the head sits as the crown of the body, for most people it is every other body part that actually rules. Our palates salivate, so we grab for the extra cookie; our eyes desire, so we spend beyond our means; our desires flare, so we reach for the forbidden; our legs grow weary, so we abandon the treadmill; our tongues grow restless, and so we unfurl gossip. Day in and day out we respond to the dictates of the body, but the head, the supposed capitol of our resolve, our will, our better judgment, well, it seems to be a silent partner. But as the New Year approaches that farewell warning our mothers and fathers gave us while standing by the front gate should echo with solemnity: USE YOUR HEAD!

On Rosh Hashanah, too, we stand before a gate, the Heavenly Gate of God, which is wide open to hear our prayers of repentance and our beseeching for health, wealth and life. We have big plans for the year ahead and we supplicate our Maker until the holy gate closes. Then we pivot back to our lives, and as we are ushered out of the synagogue God tells all his children: “Use your head.”

Rosh Hashanah, is not translated as “New Year” for really there is nothing “new” about it if tomorrow we behave the same as we did yesterday. But rather, it is translated as “head” of the year; for just as the head is the command center that directs the rest of the body so, too, Rosh Hashanah can be the command center that will tell the rest of the year what to do. On no other day are Jews more humble, afraid, repentant, well-intentioned, resolved, regretful, hopeful, beneficent and primed for change. The year ahead is replete with potential. But it depends on one thing. Will you take the potency of Rosh Hashanah with you into the New Year or will you, like so many children, leave your head at home and go into the New Year with just your feet? (In fact the Hebrew word for foot, regel, has the same root word as the Hebrew word ragil, which means “like usual.”) And the lesson is we can’t let our feet lead as usual if we want to do be a victor of habit instead of its victim.

Yom Kippur and Rosh Hashanah may effectively bleach your sins and failings, but they cannot correct why you faltered to begin with. Unless we take a reckoning with the “whys?” we will forge forward not with a clean slate but rather with a tie-dyed start.

And so, on these auspicious days, we are provided with a God-blessed opportunity and responsibility to assess ourselves with diligence. You see, yesterday is not something to run away from like a mugger trying to take something from you, rather it’s a guru with something great to give you and teach you if you are ready to learn. And tomorrow is not something to run toward while wearing yesterday’s muddy shoes, while consorting with yesterday’s bad friends, while going to yesterday’s bad hangouts, while sticking to yesterday’s unhealthy schedule, and while pursuing yesterday’s noxious entertainment.

We start out with good intentions and yet we are told that God doesn't recognize the Jewish people from one Yom Kippur to the next. The pure souls that left the synagogue a year earlier have returned in a blemished state one year later. And I cannot help but think of the fish heads and goat heads which symbolically grace Rosh Hashanah tables around the world and wonder at what point did we too lose our heads along the way? Our parents’ words echo once again: “If your head wouldn’t be screwed on, would you lose that too?”

Friends, now is the time to barge into our own lives screaming like a dissatisfied customer and demand to know: Who is in charge here, our head or our feet? And I just pray that in one year from now, when God greets us once again at His Gates of Judgment, He will say, "Children, I’m so proud of you. You really have a head on your shoulders.”

Shabbat Shalom. Shanah Tovah!

Where Are You Looking?

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"Why am I here?" and "What's my purpose in life?" These questions resonate with many, especially during moments of uncertainty and introspection. They are fundamentally spiritual questions, yet some remain unsatisfied with the simple, spiritual response: serving God and elevating the world is your purpose.

"Nah, it has to be more than that," is a common refrain, often heard from those reluctant to embrace religious duties that might disrupt their daily routines or necessitate a change of menu. In an attempt to soothe empty hearts and weary souls, they fill their lives with material possessions, vacations, external adornments, sometimes drugs and alcohol, or illicit relationships. Yet, these are mere band-aids on wounds that are seeking deeper and more poignant remedies.

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The epitome of such lives can be found in the entertainment world where the beautiful people seem to have it all, yet their lives are marked by divorce, depression, addiction, and often untimely ends. These glaring examples should teach us that the shallow pursuit of more and abundance will never provide satisfactory answers to life's profound questions. Instead, it often exacerbates our frustration, leaving us with gold in our hands but empty hearts.

Perhaps the most wasteful question we can ask is, "What does God want from us?" The answer is not elusive; it is plainly written in God's Torah. Yet, we often place more trust in influencers and gurus than in God's own word. We view God's rules as an inconvenience, searching for quicker paths to happiness, akin to golden calves. How has that approach been working out?

We are indeed a generation adept at asking questions but often resistant to listening to the answers, especially when they require change. It's akin to someone asking, "How can I lose weight?" and becoming frustrated upon hearing that it involves eating less and exercising. They may seek alternative solutions like diet pills, mouth braces, or surgery, all while watching themselves gain weight each year. In matters of truth, there is only one answer, and that is the word of God. Even the American dollar wisely acknowledges, "In God we trust."

It is a law of nature that every empty space beckons to be filled—crevices with dirt or water, blank walls with artwork, buckets with rain, chairs with sitters, and hearts and souls with purpose. The choice of what to fill the emptiness with has always been ours to make.

While some people travel the world seeking answers and to find themselves, we can set aside the travel brochures. What we seek requires no frequent flyer miles or suitcases. The truth we seek is already within us; we just need to reconnect with it. Every quest is ultimately a search for God, but often misplaced and in the wrong destinations.

This week's Torah reading, Nitzavim-Vayelech, reminds us that God's word is not distant; it is close, within our grasp, and nestled in our hearts, waiting for us to heed its guidance. The Torah is the DNA of reality, and to subvert or ignore it only serves to expand our emptiness.

In our relentless search for meaning, let us not forget that the answers are closer than we think. We need only to be honest enough and strong enough to accept the answers. The Torah explicitly states that if a person flouts God's will and says, "I will have peace, even if I follow my heart's desires," he will be punished. We were given the choice between blessings and curses. God advised us to choose life. 

In our everyday lives, when a person nearby sneezes, we usually say "Bless you," even to a stranger standing in line near us or at the next table. However, if the person is far away, we typically won't. Similarly, in our relationship with God, those who stand close will be blessed. Those who are far, it's time to come back. As the Jewish New Year is upon us, it's a perfect time to turn inward, embrace the truth, and reconnect with the purpose that has always resided within us: to serve God and become the best version of ourselves through His Word. Shabbat Shalom

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Change Your Mind; Change Your Find

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If you ask people to express what they want most  in life, the majority will say: Happiness.

“I just want to be happy” is a mantra that echoes in the longing hearts of so many individuals. And yet, this seemingly simple goal seems to evade so many of us. Gurus and self-help books offer much advice on how to grasp this elusive objective. They make their millions and as for us, well, recent statistics show that only 19 percent of Americans are “very happy.” Twenty four percent indicated they were "not very happy." The remaining respondents labelled themselves as "fairly happy.”

The ancient Jewish teachings of the Mishna teach us the way to achieve happiness in one sentence, which in Jewish fashion, starts with a question: “Who is rich[contented]? One who is happy with his lot.” Happiness, my friends, is a state of mind that is reached through one thing alone: Gratitude. As Jordan Peterson says, “Gratitude is the best antidote to bitterness.”

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Gratitude is the means through which we discipline ourselves to appreciate what we have now and in the moment. Gratitude is our testament of faith whereby we acknowledge that things are happening FOR us, not TO us. Instead, most of us grumble as we go and imagine all the things we think we need, with the uncorroborated hopes that they will make us happier. When we live in gratitude instead of “baditude,” we focus on what we have, we value our lot, instead of pouring destructive energy into what we lack. As the expression goes: “Where focus goes, energy flows.”

Unfortunately, an even more popular sentence starts with, “I’m grateful, don’t get me wrong, BUT….” There is always a "but." In Hebrew, the word aval, BUT, is spelled the same as the word mourning. The but allows us to pivot to sadness and complaints.

When we live with gratitude, there are no “ifs,” “ands,” or “buts”! And that is why the first thing a Jew says every morning before getting out of bed is, “Thank You.”  This 12-word Hebrew prayer “Modeh Ani” inverts normal syntax and loosely translated starts with, “Thank You, I.” The “thanks” comes before the “I.” Living in gratitude is living in faith and it is transformative.

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Modern studies prove this to be true.  If we make sincere gratitude, ritual gratitude, a daily practice, we can increase our happiness and even improve our health. Gratitude reduces cortisol in the body, reduces depression, improves relationships, and improves productivity and loyalty in employees. It also has a pay-it-forward impact. Whereas misery loves company, gratitude is a creative force that illuminates the world and realigns it.

It’s interesting that in Hebrew the word for thank you is todah, when those same letters are permuted, they spell the word dotah which means “illness.” When we are unthankful, we are like an emotionally sick person and we separate ourselves from the Source of life and abundance. For certain the ungrateful among us eat themselves up alive and make themselves sick.

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Being thankful and grateful is not only a state of mind; it has to be reflected in actions. We have to think thanks and also speak it and do it! And so, in this week’s Torah reading, Moses tells the Israelites that when they come to the Promised Land, they are to bring the first-ripened fruits and declare gratitude for all that G‑d has done for them. Giving thanks reminds us that we are not responsible for our success. Gratitude is a life-enhancing holy lens through which to view the world and the part we play in it.

Both personally and professionally, I’ve known too many people who have a “use them and abuse them” mentality. They take what they can from us, even from G-d, and when our usefulness expires, they kick us to the curb. These thankless people may regard themselves as geniuses in their game of life, but the Torah regards them as Pharaohs, as arrogant enemies of Hashem. People are the vessels through which G-d delivers His blessings. If you treat people badly, you treat G-d badly. 

In contrast, the Torah teaches us a very different lesson about gratitude. After all the suffering which the Egyptians caused the Israelites over their long years of slavery, the Torah commands us, “You shall not hate an Egyptian.” Why not?  We are not permitted to despise them because they once hosted us in a time of need. We were once sojourners in their land. If we are not permitted to hate those who tormented us because they were once good to us, imagine how much more we owe those who were good to us! And how much gratitude we owe to G-d most of all!

It is only when we are in a perpetual state of gratitude that our best blessings are yet to come. The Talmud teaches that the Divine presence will not rest on a person in a state of sadness. Gratitude is a fundamental of Judaism. In fact, the term "Yehudi"-- Jew, comes from the Hebrew name Yehuda, which means thanks and gratitude. It is thus from the tribe of Yehuda that the Mashiach will come. 

Change your mind, change your find! If you’re grateful you can be happy now. Put on your rose colored glasses and give life a new look!

Shabbat Shalom

A Lot on Your Plate?

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A few years ago, someone told me about an all–you-can-eat restaurant that charges customers a fixed price no matter how much food they pack on their plates. But then, the establishment ALSO charges customers by weight for the food they leave on their plates, basically for the food they waste. What a clever idea to minimize squander!

 And since my mind is always steeped in Torah, I could not help but make the quick leap to our relationship with the Almighty and our purpose in life: When our time comes, how much of our life’s purpose will be actualized and how much will still be left on the “plate” and wasted?

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Indeed, all of us have things for which we need to repent and have regrets for things we’ve done. We pray, we’re contrite and beg G-d to forgive us.  But few of us realize that on Judgment Day, we will also have to account for all the things we failed to do.

We have only one life in which to partake and utilize the beautiful “smorgasbord” of opportunities and talents with which we were blessed. Yet, sadly, so many of us waste our lives. We starve our potential and feed our fears. But that is no healthy regimen.

 

As the famous quote goes: “Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!” Why are we starving? Because we satisfy ourselves with artificial sweeteners instead of harvesting our talents and potential. We get lost in a world of distractions and amuse ourselves with frippery to pass the time. We let all that life has to offer us and all that we have to offer life, rot and grow cold on the table. We forget that we are here for a reason, a G-dly reason.

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And that is a shame, a travesty, and a tragedy because each one of us is special and has something unique to offer the world.

 

Do you recall the old General Electric motto? “We Bring Good Things to Life”  Well, if GE brings good things to life, just imagine what G-d brings to life! For certain, remarkable things and necessary things. G-d indeed created ex nihilo, i.e., something from nothing. But He doesn’t create something for nothing. He made man and fashioned us in His image. And each of us has a Divine and moral obligation to fulfill our unique potential. G-d said, “Let us make man,” in the plural. We must be partners in our own creation.

 

If you’ll oblige me a moment of levity this reminds me of a joke: “Why did the patient fire his therapist after eating a buffet-style meal at his doctor's house? Because when the patient arrived his therapist told him, ‘Help yourself!’”

 

What stops us from helping ourselves and activating our potential? The answer can be found in this week’s Parasha, Ki Teitzei, which prohibits us from plowing a field with an ox and donkey together. There are many explanations for this prohibition, but the one relevant to us now is that the ox represents the elevated part in us that strives for spiritual greatness, while the donkey represents materialism with its earthly, gravitational pull. We cannot cultivate our Divine potential and greatness while tethered to the disruptive forces of the donkey. In fact, if you rearrange the Hebrew letters of chamor, meaning donkey, it becomes machar --“tomorrow.”  We have the ability to activate our purpose now, but too often we put it off until tomorrow. And as we all well know, tomorrow never comes.

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And so this week’s Torah  reading starts with the words: “When you go out to war on your enemies, the L‑rd, your G‑d, shall deliver them into your hands….”

 

The sages teach that this is not just a physical war, but also a spiritual war against the evil inclination, the Satan. Playing on our fears, he is the one who advocates for tomorrow and distracts us from doing things now! He stalls us and makes us afraid to try positing possibilities of failure. In fact, he is procrastination’s best PR "person."

 

But he is an enemy we must and can fight. We must live in faith, not fear! Imagine a seed that was afraid to change, so it never became a flower; imagine an acorn that was afraid to change, so it never became an oak tree; imagine a caterpillar that was afraid to change, so it never became a butterfly;  imagine an embryo afraid to become a fetus and a baby afraid to leave its mother’s womb.

 

People equate change with loss. But the loss is in NOT changing, in not becoming, in not growing, in not developing and in not maximizing our talents to add value to the world and to serve G-d’s will.

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There is an old but sad joke about Brazil: "Brazil has great potential and it always will." In other words, the potential is never fulfilled. Don't be Brazil!

 

G-d promises us that if we go to war against this enemy, which I call the naysayer, the propagator of fear and self-doubt, G-d will help us. G-d helps those who help themselves. So don’t be afraid to fail. You cannot become a great juggler without first dropping a lot of balls.

 

To quote Winston Churchill: “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.” 

 

It’s been said, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”  What’s true in a geo-political historical context is true for us personally as well. The evil inclination triumphs when we, good men, good women, do nothing with our lives and squander our potential.

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How many gifts and blessings has G-d put on our figurative plates? Many more than we can digest in a lifetime. Yet how many of our gifts and talents do we really use and develop to better the world, to serve G-d, to help humankind, and to help ourselves? 

 

With the High Holidays before us, it would serve us well to home in on our unique purpose and talents and start taking stock of our unused and untapped potential. Waste not, want not! Know that G-d will weigh our figurative plates and each of us will be asked a simple question: Why weren’t you as fruitful as you could be? And then, of course, there is always a price to pay.                                                                                             Shabbat Shalom